11-2-15 The Monster

It amazes me how one can be so blind to the reality they live in at times.  I was married for 10 miserable years to a monster. Thing are being told me to that i cannot even comprehend. My heard is shattered and I am almost in disbelief of what is being said but I do not doubt what has been said as been done.  I he a rapist, manipulator and one of the worst people I have ever known. I knew the sexual abuse he put me through during or marriage but was totally oblivious to the torment he was doing to others around me.  He raped my best friend and did scare tactics that are unfathomable to her. And even after all that she was still a faithful friend to me. I carry so much shame and guilt for not even being able to protect these people. Can you fathom the horror this girl lives in because of this man? Or my sister,my dear sister...forced to give him oral for a place to live or a cigarette or anything he solely manipulated everyone around me. I cannot help but feel so much hurt hate anger and despair. I just pray god can heal yet again another broken piece to my life. Please pray for me.