9-30-15 Birthday - Prison

Well, another year passes me by and for the first time in a really long time I am grateful to be alive. I am however in a bit of despair as I feel alone inside. I know the Lord is always walking by my side and helps me with anything I may stumble upon and I have prayed a lot today for him to deliver me from this feeling. My other half is incarcerated right now and I miss him dearly. I  miss his touch, kisses and ultimately his companionship. I don't even have the desire for anyone but him. I have thought what it might be like walking away but I know deep inside no one will ever compare to the happiness and belonging he shares with me. Many are judgmental and expect one to just walk away from him but I realize they do not understand God's Law. God's law is Love. Hebrews 13:3 states "Remember those who are in prison, as though in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in body" and I know the Lord does not want me to turn my back as much of this broken world has on him. I will be his ray of hope to help him deal with a loneliness that I could not imagine. I also was imprisoned and I know first hand how awful of a feeling this was. Alone, desperate, broken and hopeless. I always point him to scripture when he is down or angry well for practically anything as I don't know the answers but I do know who does, God. He is good if only we learn to seek him in the right moments, which is every moment. I am still working on this as well but God does not expect perfection but delights in progression. I must remember it has taken me 20+ years to become this broken and it will take time to become less broken. I am not sure once you're broken that you can ever become "unbroken" as those scars still remain but with time and God as my reference I believe he will make me wise enough to know what to do in every situation so long as I seek him. He will transform my mind and heart so slowly that I will not even realize as it's happening and one day I will be able to look back and see just how far he has brought me. Thank you Lord, my father and comforter in all the parts of my life.